


V is for Vodka

by momstiel



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Non-Magical, Bartender Remus Lupin, Childhood Friends, Drinking, Eventual Happy Ending, Falling In Love, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Getting to Know Each Other, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Nightmares, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Past Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romance, Scars, Sexual Content, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Triggers, businessman sirius
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-09
Updated: 2018-11-13
Packaged: 2019-08-21 06:05:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16571060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/momstiel/pseuds/momstiel
Summary: Just when Sirius Black is about to give up the fight he bumps into someone from his past who reminds him how to live again.The telling of a black-sheep and a mysterious bartender's trials to finding love, safety, and vodka.(Despite the "rape" warning, nothing graphic is depicted for it.)





	1. Rotting in 12 Grimmauld Place

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Thanks for clicking on this! Each chapter will have a content warning, so be sure to read that! 
> 
> CW: Small mention of child abuse

“You better be back here by-”

 

“11:00 sharp tomorrow morning, yeah, yeah, I know, Reggie. It’s not like you’ve mentioned that ten times before or anything.” Sirius rolled his eyes, casually blowing on his nails in an attempt to look uninterested with the conversation. Even though he was staring at his nails - which he’d need to remember to paint black later to spite his dear parents - he already knew his brother was wearing the same constipated expression that he always did whenever he was relaying information.

 

“I’m being serious, mother will actually murder you this time if you’re late. She’s already pissed off about your absence at that last meeting.” Regulus reminded, turning on his heel. It was visible he was fed-up with Sirius’s nonchalant attitude.

 

Sirius rolled his eyes, “I don’t give a rat’s ass if she’s pissed.”

 

“You should.” And with that, Regulus was already gone, leaving Sirius alone in his own thoughts.

 

The room had a dark atmosphere to it like the rest of Grimmauld Place, and Sirius despised it. It was nothing like the Potter estate, which although big, always felt homey and welcoming. In this moment, all Sirius could think about was how he’d give anything to be there.

 

Sirius Black was eleven years old when he met James Potter at Hogwarts - a posh boarding school in Scotland. It was a Black family tradition to attend the academy. Once, his father had even insisted this school was finally going to show him how to act like a proper Black heir. Originally, Sirius had despised the idea of following his parent’s footsteps, even at such of a young age. There was also a boy - Remus Lupin - who lived down the road. Every since he was six years old, the two had snuck out together at night. Sirius knew that his parents would never approve of his friendship with the other, so they kept it a secret. The idea of leaving behind his only friend destroyed him at the time. However, in hindsight, it was probably the best thing that had ever happened to him.

 

The first time Sirius met James, he knew he was just like Remus. He was selfless, brave, and above all - mischievous. During their time at Hogwarts, the two of them (occasionally accompanied by Peter Pettigrew, a childhood friend of James’) managed to stir up more mayhem then the institution had seen in all of its years. It wasn’t long before they became legends of sorts among their peers.

 

Unfortunately, not everyone had viewed their pranks as magnificent. His mother and father were furious when they heard about the way he behaved. When he returned from Hogwarts for the summers, punishments were almost always intact. To this day, he still had faint lines scorched into his skin, reminding him of every discipline he received. Much to his parents dismay, this never managed to stop him. If anything, it fueled Sirius to act out even more.

 

Concluding his fifth year, Sirius had spitefully decided to avoid coming home for summer. Without parental consent, he had decided to stay with the Potters. It was a brilliant few days that he was there. The Potter Estate was nothing like Grimmauld Place. James’s home was warm, cozy, and best of all both of his parents had welcomed him with open arms. For the first time in his life, he had witnessed how a family should behave. It was short lived, however. On the fourth day, Walburga Black had burst into the household, making a huge scene as she forcefully took Sirius back home. It was safe to say he spent the rest of that summer locked up in his room.

 

Now that he and James had graduated from Hogwarts, Sirius found himself back at Grimmauld place. However, it was a lot different than from how he remembered it being at age ten. For one thing, his secret - the boy down the road - was gone. It had came as quite a surprise to Sirius when he arrived home only to see the Lupin’s house abandoned.

 

Secondly, now his parents were insistent on him joining the family business. They had tried roping him into a meeting a month ago, but Sirius had conveniently decided against going. Naturally, this only proved to piss his parents off further - who threatened to kick him out of the house if he didn’t attend tomorrow’s conference.

 

Sirius sat down on the edge of his bed, eyeing the mirror on the wall and staring idly into his reflection. Oh, how he had changed over the years. Of course, he was still raggedly attractive - a trait that seemed to bless all the Blacks - but he looked worn out. There were uncharacteristic bags under his eyes and the usual flame in his eyes was nowhere to be found. He had little time to examine his features before he hears a faint buzzing noise coming from his bed.

  
  
Breaking out of his trance, Sirius reached over for his phone and picked up. Almost instantly he perked up when he recognized the number. He answered happily, “Missing my wonderful presence already, James?”

 

“Oh, definitely,” A familiar chuckle made its way through the receiver. “I was actually calling up to see if you could make it to the pub on sixth street tonight. Lily’s out with Marlene and Dorcas, so I thought it’d be ideal if you, Pete, and I could just hang out together - just the three of us.”

 

Sirius’s lips curled into a small smile, “You know I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” He replied genuinely. Hanging out with the boys was definitely the highlight of any afternoon for him. As much as he liked Lily, James’s fiancee, he couldn’t deny that he loved to indulge in some alone time with just his mates.

 

“Great!” Even though Sirius couldn’t see him, he already knew there was a grin gracing his best friend’s lips. “I’ll see you then.”

  
  
“See you then,” Sirius echoed, about to put his finger over the end call button when he heard James’s voice softly call out his name. “Yeah?”

 

“I’ve been, uh, meaning to ask… how is it, being back there? With your parents and all that?” James finally bit the bullet.

 

Even though he knew this conversation was coming, he was still got off guard. Instantly, he formed a lie, “Oh, it’s great.”

 

There was a pause, as if James was trying to find the right words. “Are you sure, Sirius? I mean, you know you always have an open invite at Lily and mine’s. You don’t need to stay there.”

 

Sirius’s heart swelled. He wanted to take up the offer, but he knew very well he couldn’t. Not yet, at least. “You know I can’t exactly leave Regulus here alone. Plus, I’m only going to be here for a few months, as I get a grip on how the Black company runs. Then, I’m off.”

 

“Alright, mate. I know.” James’s voice wavered slightly, but it wasn’t long before it regained its usual upbeatness. “I’m looking forward to seeing you tonight! Pete’s apparently got a girlfriend!”

 

“I’ll see it when I believe it,” Sirius joked. It wasn’t that Peter wasn’t relationship material, it was that the boy had a tendency to turn into a clammy mess around the fairer sex.

 

A tiny grin fell on his lips. Who knew about tomorrow - but definitely, tonight was going to be great. 


	2. Vodka and Teddy Bears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus almost squashes a teddy bear, and has a very awkward encounter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: None

“I think after serving vodka to middle-aged men all day, I need some vodka myself.” Alice informed Remus, not even one foot into their shared flat yet. It was nice having someone who understood the agony of bartending, though hearing a long-winded rant about it the whole car ride wasn’t something that tickled Remus’s fancy. “Want me to pour you some?” 

 

Alice flickered her car keys towards the coffee table, kicking her shoes off at the door. Remus followed suit behind her, taking off his coat and placing it on the couch. “As appealing as that offer is, I have another shift tomorrow night and the last thing I need is to spend the first part of the day recovering from a hangover.” 

 

“Oh, c’mon,” She responded, already making her way towards their small kitchen. “I never said you should get blackout drunk, just…” Alice paused, scanning over which brand she wanted, before pulling one out - along with a small glass. “- Just, a little buzz never killed anyone.” 

 

A small grin started to tug on Remus’s lips, and he waved his hand dismissively, “Alright, alright. Pour me a little.” He gave in, lounging back on his sofa carelessly. Instantly, he felt himself being uncomfortably prodded in the arse. Rolling to the side, he moved to grab the guilty party. He found himself staring at the slightly squashed face of a red teddy bear, covered in a tacky heart print. 

 

“Don’t kill poor Mr.Hearts.” Alice tutted, arriving with two glasses in tow. She placed them on the small coffee table, letting out a small sigh as she collapsed next to Remus. 

 

“You named him Mr. Hearts?” Remus arched an amused brow, “Well, if that isn’t the most creative name ever.” The comment earned him a soft whack to his arm. 

 

Remus Lupin stared down at the teddy bear for a few seconds before moving it to the side. The plush had been a gift from Frank Longbottom, Alice’s boyfriend - or, fiance now - when he proposed. He felt a sharp tug in his heart when he thought about the proposal. 

 

For far too many years to count, Alice had always been there for him. They had been neighbors, and through the good and the bad, she had never left him once. Sometimes, that’s all he needed. Someone that wasn’t going to leave. 

 

When they were both eighteen years old, they had moved out from their respective households and worked together to purchase a flat. It wasn’t anything impressive - far from it, actually. However, it was the most they could scrape up between their small checks. Alice’s father had given her a decent sum of money, which she used to purchase a car so that neither of them had to use the slummy buses. 

 

Everything was going smoothly - that was, until Alice met Frank at the bar. He was nice enough and something about him had wooed her over. One date turned into two and so on until he proposed almost a year in. Of course, Remus was happy for his best friend - but it didn’t stop him from feeling sad about it deep down. It was only a matter of time before she left, too. They would get married, buy a house, and yet again he’d be down one friend. 

 

“You going to drink it, weirdo? Or are you just going to stare longingly at the wall and contemplate how shitty life is?” Alice asked, already finished with the little vodka she had poured in her glass. Remus hadn’t even realized he had been staring until she had snapped him out of it. 

 

Bringing the cup to his lips, Remus chuckled, “Bold of you to assume I need to be staring at something to contemplate how shitty life is.” He lifted the glass after downing the small shot. “Cheers.”

 

“Cheers, Lupin.”

 

* * *

 

_ It was not an unfamiliar room. In fact, quite the contrary. Yet, for some reason it always felt so distant and cold. Remus recognized it in a heartbeat. It was the bedroom from his childhood, back in his old house.  _

 

_ He found himself staring aimlessly at the room. He took in every small detail, even though he had became very accustomed to the space in his dreams.  _

 

_ “ Little Lupin…”  _

 

_ There it was. The familiar voice that always called out.  _

 

_ Almost instantly, he felt as if his whole body turned into sand. Every small movement required an unreasonably difficult amount of energy. That’s why he couldn’t move an inch when a shadowy figure appeared behind him. A big hand grasped Remus’s shoulder firmly, long nails digging into the sensitive skin. “Let’s play a game, shall we?”  _

 

_ Remus wanted to say no. He wanted to run. He wanted to do something - anything. Yet, his body worked against him and just stayed stiff and docile.  _

 

_ “Remus.” _

 

_ “Remus?” _

 

* * *

 

“Remus?” 

 

Remus’s eyes flashed open at the call only to find a man leaning over him. Instantly panicked pumped through his veins and without thought he kicked the male back. He shot straight up, scanning his surroundings. He was in his small little flat, he wasn’t in his old bedroom anymore. That, at least, was a relief. 

  
  
“Ouch!” 

 

The sound of a wince caught Remus’s attention and he turned to get a better look at the man he had sent to the floor. A young man was grabbing his stomach, curled over in discomfort. Instantly, Remus recognized the other. Frank Longbottom. 

 

“You scared me,” Remus rubbed his neck nervously, a faint blush coloring his cheeks. To be fair, it  _ was  _ Frank’s fault for coming into his room unwelcomed. “Sorry about that kick.” 

 

“Eh, it’s fine.” Frank removed the arm he previously had supporting his stomach. “Sorry for scaring you. Alice gave me a key to the flat and asked me to come here to retrieve her jacket. I would have just popped in and out in a flash, but I heard some wicked thrashing and whimpering coming from your room.” 

 

Instinctively, Remus buried his head into his knees out of embarrassment. 

 

“I would have just left you be. I didn’t want to intrude, especially if you were doing something with someone,” Frank waggled his brow and Remus wanted to sink into the bed. “But, your door was open and nobody was inside. Thought it’d be a pretty asshole move if I just left you to that nightmare you seemed to be having.” 

 

Despite how much he wanted to, Remus couldn’t find any fault in the other’s logic. He broke the silence with a defeated sigh. “Alright, well, I appreciate your concern. Thanks for waking me up.” 

 

“No problem, anything for Alice’s best friend.” Frank grinned and softly elbowed Remus. It was meant to be a playful, brother-like exchange, but it felt awkward due to how little they knew about each other. They had hung out once or twice, when Alice tried to introduce them to each other over ice cream at Florean Fortescue’s parlor. Originally, Longbottom approached him with hostility, not overly thrilled to discover his girlfriend shared a flat with another man. However, most of the tension defused after Frank discovered Remus was gay, and the only relationship he’d ever want to pursue with Alice was a platonic one. “So what was that nightmare about anyway?” 

 

There was no way Frank could have known how intrusive the question was, as he remained blissfully unaware of the complexity that was Remus Lupin’s life. Not feeling like getting into it with a mere acquaintance, Remus just plastered on a fake smile and scrambled around for a quick lie. “You know, the usual. Just some dumb dream about ghosts kidnapping me and whatever.” He waved his hand dismissively. 

 

The concern on Frank’s face immediately dissolved and a smile appeared. “Yeah, I get that. Screw those ghosts, am I right?” He chuckled and patted the other’s knee before standing up. “Look, I better get back to Alice before she wonders where I am.” 

 

Remus just nodded and smiled, relieved as Frank made his exit. Once he heard the front door slam shut, he stretched and got up. He was glad to finally have some free time to himself. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter should be out soon!


	3. The Bra Situation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius goes out for a night of fun with his best mates, and wakes up the next morning with a wicked hangover... and a bra?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW ; None

It started out as a little competition between him and James, but it quickly escalated into something much more. Somehow Sirius had found himself in the parking lot of the bar, soaked, and wearing some bird’s bra. He was stumbling around, Peter trying his best (and failing) to keep both of his wasted best friends under control. 

 

“Can’t believe you took that many shots” James slurred, collapsing against Peter’s trunk when they arrived. Sirius rested his body against the vehicle, a shit-eating grin residing on his lips all the while. 

 

“Don’t underestimate me, Jamie-boy,” Sirius hissed, trying to open the door to the car but not quite being able to grasp the idea that Pete had not unlocked it yet. He continued tugging on the knob impatiently as his friend fished out his keys. 

 

When the door was finally unlocked, Sirius launched himself into the passenger seat as Peter essentially shoved James into the backseat. “If you boys want, we can crash back at my place. Lils won’t mind.” 

 

Too drunk out of his mind to find any reason to oppose, Sirius agreed. 

 

“You guys aren’t going to like, puke in my car, are you?” Peter asked as he got into the driver’s seat, starting the ignition as it roared to life. 

 

* * *

 

When Sirius woke up, he only knew two things. First off, if the rays of sunlight that were burning his eyes called for anything - it was already midday. Secondly, he needed to run to the toilet, and he needed to do it now.  He flung himself out of bed towards the hall, being grateful that the guest bedroom in James’s house was just across from the bathroom.

 

Without a care in the world, he burst in through the door and made a beeline towards the toilet. All the running was giving him a headache, and his desire to puke his stomach out only intensified as he made it to his destination. Halfway through his first heave, he started to pay more attention to himself and the world around him. 

 

Between upchucks, Sirius found himself staring down at a pink laced bra over his wrinkly clothing. Confusion bubbled up inside of him as he tried to piece together what exactly had happened last night. To his horror, no memory of what happened surfaced. Usually, he wouldn’t be too bothered over a blackout hangover, but something he couldn’t just quite remember kept tugging at his gut. He couldn’t help but feel like he was forgetting something. 

 

Once Sirius had stopped throwing up whatever had had for supper last night, he washed his mouth out with some water from the sink before heading out. A groan escaped his lips, and he attempted to escape back into his bed but was stopped by Lily. 

 

She was holding a mug of what Sirius could only assume was tea. As green eyes observed him, red lips welcomed the warm taste of the liquid. “Fun night, huh?” Lily accused.

 

“I think so,” Sirius began with a shrug, “Not that I can remember a single damn thing about it.” 

 

“Didn’t think you would,” Lily returned the shrug, “Peter told me that you and James got into a bit of a drinking competition. Heard you downed eight shots of firewhiskey.” There was a look of disapproval on her face, but it quickly turned into amusement. “Lunch is in the kitchen.” 

 

“By the way, Black,” The redhead began, walking past Sirius in the direction of her bedroom. “Pink isn’t your color,” 

 

Sirius’s cheeks turned a hot red as he remembered that he was still wearing the item and he quickly struggled to remove it. Once he did so, he quickly threw the object into the guest bedroom before heading towards the kitchen. Lily had confirmed his suspicions of it being midday, though. 

 

James was lounging in the kitchen, poking his pasta with a fork. He looked up and a smile fell on his face when he saw his friend. “Sleeping beauty is finally awake, eh?” He joked around playfully. 

 

“Oh sod off,” Sirius waved his hand, his eyes falling onto the plate of perfectly made pasta that was waiting for him on the counter. As soon as he got the food, he finally observed James’s appearance. An amused snort escaped, “Looks like I could say the same to you.” 

 

James grinned a tiny bit, throwing his arms up in defeat, “You caught me. Lily woke me up twenty minutes ago to help her with lunch.” He motioned to a glass of water, “Might help a tiny bit.” 

 

Sirius took the offering and went to find a seat in the dining room. “Do you remember a single thing that happened last night?” He asked before he indulged in a fork-full of the pasta. Instantly, heaven made itself present in his mouth. Lily truly was the best cook, next to Mrs. Potter, Sirius ever had the pleasure of eating from. 

 

“Not a single fucking thing,” James admitted, coming and sitting across from him. “But, Pete told Lily, who told me. Sounds like we had a pretty good time. Shame we can’t remember a lick of it,” He chuckled under his breath, shaking his head with visible amusement. Sirius motioned for James to continue on and spill all the details. 

 

“So, we arrived at the bar, okay? And Pete comes holding this fucking  _ bra _ , because it’s alleged proof of his ‘girlfriend’-” Sirius arched a questioning eyebrow, but James continued on, “-Yeah, I know. Weird, but what can you expect from him? Then we were chilling, talking a little. You know, usual. Apparently you went on a ten minute rant about your mum, all while downing shots. Stuff happened, and you and I started competing to see who could do the most shots before getting pissed.” Sirius snorted. Yeah, that sounded like them. “Well, halfway through your seventh shot, you trip and face plant straight into some bird’s chest.” 

 

Sirius spit out the water he had been drinking all over the floor. No way. That kinda stuff happened to Peter, that stuff didn’t happen to him. His cheeks turned red.  

 

“Yeah…” James rubbed his neck awkwardly, “She didn’t really like that and she splashed her drink onto your shirt. By that time, we were both pretty gone but Peter was feeling the embarrassment we probably should have. So, he took us outside. You said were cold because the wetness and Pete offered you the bra and you just kinda were like, ‘clothing is clothing’.” 

 

He probably should have been embarrassed by that, but Sirius only found himself chuckling. “God, at least know why I woke up with my shirt all wrinkled and reeking of alcohol.” 

 

“And why you were wearing a bra?” James arched a brow, standing up and taking his empty glass to the sink. 

 

“Oh sod off, Potter.” Sirius smirked, rolling his eyes and returning back to his pasta. He only got another bite in before Lily walked into the dining hall. She looked agitated, holding up his leather jacket. 

 

“Your phone won’t stop ringing and buzzing,” The woman explained as she launched the coat into his lap. “It was driving me up the wall.” 

 

Sirius brought his attention to his jacket - which was, in fact, beeping with text messages. He was puzzled - who would be this eager to contact him? As he fished the device out, a familiar name popped onto the screen.  _ Reg.  _ Instantly it all came rushing back. His eyes flickered to the top of the monitor, desperately searching out for the time.  _ 12:54.  _

 

He had  _ definitely _ missed the meeting. He had two missed calls from Regulus, along with over ten text messages. “Oh shit… Oh shit…” Grey eyes widened in panic. 

 

His freakout had caught the attention of both Lily and James, who came to his side instantly. Lily placed a hand on his shoulder, and James frowned, “What is it?” 

 

Sirius struggled to put on his jacket, hurriedly excusing himself from the table. “I need to go, right now.” He didn’t even care that he had not been able to finish his meal - he just knew he needed to escape right this second before the storm came.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my beta reader @Adzel!
> 
> Next chapter, two people might finally cross paths after all this time~


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